The Silent killer #Project84

Writing this piece has been incredibly tough for me, as I am faced with my own version of the truth, a big taboo and an inconvenient fact that suicide is the biggest killer of men between 20 and 49, eclipsing road accidents, cancer and coronary heart disease.

This week one of 84 men who die weekly, was one of my own beloved school friends, and the really sad part is that this is the third school friend I have lost over the last 20 years to suicide, which is heartbreaking because I have seen the devastation caused and the fragments of broken lives having to be put back together by their families, friends and colleagues.

But here it is, the big ugly truth that even though a circle of friends have seen the damage suicide causes, we still never stopped to ask, “are you okay?” we just bit our lips dusted off the harsh reality of lost friendships and battled our own challenges and demons, never once considering that perhaps we needed to talk.

With all of my heart, I do not want another sister, brother, mother, wife, family, colleague or friend to suffer in silence. I know we are all busy and do not want to burden our colleagues, friends or families with our problems, but if a problem shared can lead to somebody seeking help then I am here, I am present and I am here to support, because it may hurt today, tomorrow or maybe this month, but pain is temporary and by the simple act of sharing whats important to us, may lead to helping save a life.

For more information or support, contact Samaritans or me (0845 790 9090, or Mind (0300 123 3393,

Or if you have lost a loved one and need support please go here.

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